This lesson teaches children that God wants us to be kind, honest, and loving toward each other, because we belong to one family in Jesus. It is designed for children ages 5 to 11 and takes about 20 to 30 minutes to teach, including the story, questions, and an activity.
Big Idea
God’s family is one family, so we treat each other with kindness, tell the truth, and forgive, just as God forgave us.
Memory Verse
Ephesians 4:32
And be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you.
(WEB)
Have children stand in a circle and hold hands. As they say the verse together, have them gently squeeze the hand of the friend on their left on “kind,” then the friend on their right on “forgiving.” Repeat it three times, faster each time, until everyone is giggling.
The Story: Ephesians 4 for Kids
Long ago, a man named Paul was in prison because he loved telling people about Jesus. He wrote a letter to the friends in the city of Ephesus. In it, he asked them to live in a way that showed they belonged to God. He wanted them to be gentle and patient with one another, even when it was hard.
Paul told them that there is one body, one Spirit, one Lord, and one God and Father of all. Everyone who follows Jesus is part of the same family. Paul explained that Jesus gave different gifts to different people. Some were teachers, some were helpers, and some shared the good news. Each person had an important job to do, and together they built up the whole family.
Next, Paul talked about how their lives should change. He said that people who did not know God often chose selfish and angry ways of living. But the friends in Ephesus had learned about Jesus, so they should put off their old ways. Paul told them to take off the old clothes of lying, stealing, and nasty words, and to put on the new clothes of truth, honest work, and kind talk. He said, “Speak the truth to your neighbor, because we belong to one another.”
Paul also warned them about anger. He said it is okay to feel angry, but they should not let anger make them sin. They should not let the sun go down while they were still holding onto their upset feelings. Paul knew that God’s helper, the Holy Spirit, is with us, and that our words and actions can make God happy or sad.
Finally, Paul gave the most important reminder of all. He told them to be kind to each other, to be tender-hearted, and to forgive one another. He said God had forgiven them through Jesus, so they should forgive others in the same way. That is how a family grows strong and loving.
Read It Together
Ephesians 4:2-3
2 With all lowliness and humility, with patience, bearing with one another in love; 3 being eager to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
(WEB)
Point out the words “patience,” “love,” and “peace.” Ask children what they think it looks like to be patient with a sibling or classmate. Explain that keeping peace is something we work at together, not something we do alone.
Ephesians 4:11-12
11 He gave some to be apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, shepherds and teachers; 12 for the perfecting of the saints, to the work of serving, to the building up of the body of Christ…
(WEB)
Show how God gave different gifts to different people for the good of everyone. Ask children to name one thing they are good at and one way they could use it to help someone in their class, church, or home.
Ephesians 4:25-27
25 Therefore putting away falsehood, speak truth each one with his neighbor. For we are members of one another. 26 “Be angry, and don’t sin.” Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath, 27 and don’t give place to the devil.
(WEB)
Point out that Paul said it is okay to be angry, but we must not let anger turn into sin. Explain that we should talk about our feelings and make things right before bedtime, so we do not carry bad feelings into the next day.
Talk About It
- What is one way you can show kindness to someone in your family this week?
- Why do you think God wants us to be one family, even with people who are different from us?
- What is something you could say to make someone feel better instead of saying something unkind?
- When you feel angry, what is a safe and kind way you can calm down?
- How does it feel to be forgiven, and how can you forgive someone who has hurt you?
Activity Ideas
Paper Chain of Kindness
You will need colored construction paper, scissors, tape or glue, and markers. Have each child write one kind word or action on a strip of paper, such as “I shared my crayons” or “I helped set the table.” Link the strips into a chain, one loop at a time, and hang it in the room or on the fridge. Explain that each link is a small way we build up God’s family together.
Pass the Peace Game
You will need a soft ball or a stuffed animal. Have children sit in a circle. As the ball is passed, the child holding it must say something kind about the person next to them, such as “You are good at drawing.” Keep the game moving so everyone gets a turn. Remind children that speaking truth in love is a way of keeping peace.
Forgiveness Stones Take-Home
You will need small smooth stones or pieces of cardboard, a marker, and a bag or envelope. Let each child draw a small heart on a stone or cardboard piece and write the word “forgive” on it. Ask them to keep the stone in a pocket or on their nightstand as a reminder to be kind and forgiving at home this week. Encourage families to talk together about one way they showed forgiveness.
Teacher Notes
For adults, Ephesians 4 shows that the church is one body with many members, each given gifts by Christ for the building up of the whole. The chapter moves from the call to unity and humility to a practical picture of a transformed life, marked by honest speech, honest work, controlled anger, and generous forgiveness. Paul grounds these everyday choices in God’s own forgiveness through Christ, which is the true source of our kindness toward others.
Be careful not to overstate to children that any single good action earns God’s love or that being angry is always a sin. Paul clearly says it is possible to be angry without sinning, and God’s love for children does not depend on their behavior. Focus on God’s grace and on the joy of belonging to His family, rather than on a checklist of rules.
A Prayer to Close
Dear God, thank You for making us one family in Jesus. Help us to be kind to each other, to tell the truth, and to forgive the way You forgave us. When we feel angry, help us calm down and make things right. Thank You for loving us every day. Amen.
